mumbling and grumbling

I have some gripes. They're not particularly serious, but I'm feeling mildly frustrated. I'm going to blame the fact that it's October, and I'm away from home and, well, everyone goes home in October. And, you know, argh. Plus I think this might actually have been the first time I've missed Tiptoe's birthday? I'm not sure, and it's certainly not a big deal especially when you factor in that she's missed mine several times because mine was always in half term. I think it's just that the reality of the fact that I'm away has finally pervaded my fogged up brain. I'm still not homesick, but I'm perhaps a little disoriented? It's late October in the northern hemisphere, but it's still warm and the leaves are still green; and now I understand why Giles was complaining about the relentless sameness of Sunnydale weather. I never thought I'd miss British weather. You can take the girl out of London, right?

Ok, so. First off, Ruby left. That wasn't a surprise, since she'd been planning it for a while. She's gone to be with Bo (boyfriend of excessive lameness), and is probably heading back to Canadia soon to study. It just sucks that she left with more of a whimper than a bang, because she had a load of dental surgery just before leaving. It would have been nice to get to say goodbye properly, rather than wince at her attempts to talk through the pain. The thing is that while she's a really nice person who I got on with very well, and had a lot of fun with, I don't think that she would have ever become one of my very close friends. She wasn't a soulmate/non-person/race that knows Joseph kinda gal. And that's not meant to sound judge-y. Some people in your life are people who you just enjoy having fun with, and they're not supposed to be anything more. And yet it still sucks a little that she's gone. Ami has this theory that in a situation like ours all your friends become imbued with more importance than you might afford to them 'back home' because you're likely to feel more attached to them. There's something to that, without roots and without the language of your host country it makes sense- plus people are always coming and going so while they're here you just want to enjoy them.

I am really sad that Aryan's left though, and so's Ami. He wasn't supposed to go, his contract's not up and he stoically refused to explain what 'family emergency' dragged him back to the UK. He's seriously one of the most awesome people I've met, and I'm going to feel the lack of my necessary quotient of British bantering sorely. The fact that people can slip in and out of your life in a job/situation like this is both good and bad. It's nice to constantly be meeting new people, and there's generally a real sense of camaraderie- people are very friendly and helpful. If I ever want to go to the States, Canadia, Aus or Kiwi-land I've got a wealth of people I could hit up for a place to stay too. I've just never really adjusted to my favourite toys being snatched away, is all. Scotty's fucked off back to Chonto too now, it;s like other people read Keourac or something. Jeez.

And the worst of it? Elica got her stupid arse fired. We may have had a somewhat debauched night a couple of weeks ago, and she didn't turn up for work the next day. She didn't even call in. She texted me and told me to tell Daryl that she was ill, which isn't in line with company protocol or any version of common sense- especially since she knows that Daryl doesn't come in until later than her own start time. Head office apparently got mad and headed straight into action (although there's a slight possibility that Smartie may have been complicit in fucking her over, but I don't really believe it). It's maddening, because she could have prevented it. It's also stupid because she's probably the most popular Korean teacher, and things are slow enough at our branch. This also happened at Yeouido, Yo got fired because they wanted to get rid of one Korean teacher apparently- yet again she was the popular one. It's possible that it was because her secret relationship with Patagonia came out, just as he was leaving. Work just doesn't feel the same without Elica shrieking, and with Ruby gone. Ruby's been replaced by Newbie, who's nice enough but very staid and proper. Freemason doesn't even have a partner, and just knocks about doing nothing. And it means that Newbie and I are picking up the slack a little, instead of having two lessons I have around six- which isn't very much but I could be enjoying doing even less. This company is completely idiotic, I'm actually a little worried that they're going to go out of business.

Also, I have to move apartments again. It's kind of ridiculous. Basically the landlord doesn't want to re-sign the contract for my flat or Tanky's. I think it's a mix of his hatred for idiotic foreigners and his hatred for idiotic companies. Everyone at HQ who was capable of independent thought has now quit because they weren't getting paid, so the entirely unintelligent M is in charge of finding me a new place to live. Not only is he dimwitted in the extreme he's also incredibly untrustworthy. He's come up with this plan to oust Tanky from the organisation, which I broadly support because I can't stand him- but his method of doing it isn't exactly laudable. He's ordered Daryl to inform Tanky that a new apartment cannot be found for him or me, which seems premature and suspicious even if you ignore the fact that Daryl's privately assured me that I will be given an apartment but that I have to act like I won't so that Tanky doesn't cotton on. In part I think that M was doing this in a bid to get Tanky to move to a different branch, but I have it on good authority that a large part of it was because everyone hates Tanky. I did feel a little bad though, because Tanky's actually put some effort into trying to sort me out with alternative housing. Apparently L (awesome Scottish dude from HQ who "trained" me) would try to sort me out with a job at his new company too, which is pretty nice. I might need it, because not only do I suspect the company of floundering (especially now that they've fucked themselves up with immigration and have won a temporary ban on new foreign teachers), I really don't trust that they (or rather, M) will find me a new apartment as promised.

God, I really don't want to pack everything up again. On the other hand moving to a building which doesn't house Tanky and his wifey would be excellente. I don't really like living on the ground floor either, and it would be nice to have an apartment with decent air con, a large window, no dog hair, a bathroom light that doesn't short out every few weeks... etc. And it will still be in Hongdae, so it shouldn't be too much hassle. I just hope that it does all work out fine. Please.

This is what I get for feeling so deeply at one with the universe. It was so comical though. I complained about being cold and not having a book to read for all of about three seconds, and suddenly post arrived- containing jumpers and books. My karma was kicking, so of course everything did have to come crashing down. Bah.

Asides from that the main thing that I have to complain about is: me. I need to stop being an idiot. I know that I state this with worrying regularity, but really it's a serious concern. I need to stop running outside to throw out the trash half-naked for one, but I think my main problem is that I do stupid things when drunk. So from now on no drunken motorcycle shenanigans or money wasting poker. (Unless it's five card stud, because come on). I also really need to switch my brain off, or learn to be a bit more productive. I keep having all these brilliant ideas for things that I want to write, and my mind darts off down random paths like a hyperactive child, but I'm not actually putting pen to paper (or fingertips to keyboard as the case may be). I most definitely do not have time to keep up with my ambitious plan of writing up what I think of each new episode of all the shows I'm watching. Was I smoking crack when I came up with that plan? Even just doing it for one show (Supernatural) is proving to be a challenge, hell even watching everything I want to watch is complicated enough. I'm not feeling motivated to do it either, especially since the last Supernatural episode, Monster Movie, was incredibly awesome but was aired out of sequence so I can't exactly say anything meaningful about the brothers' interaction. Bah. Probably I need to read less fic too. Dammit, the J2 love has been strong lately though- especially after interviews like this. The thing is that fandom and the internet actually hold seriously important places in my heart- I love the celebrating of freedom of... something along the expression/stealing/porn nexus, but it's more than that. I'm deeply impressed by the intelligence and creativity in fandom in general, and specifically in the ones that I hold most dear (Buffy, Harry Potter, Supernatural, West Wing, Firefly...). Obviously there are mind numbing fourteen year old fangirls too, but the intelligent fanfiction and commentary that exists is actually breathtaking. That's why I get pissed off when I'm unwittingly exposed to something less than wonderful. I know that it's hypocritical because of course mistakes sneak into what I'm writing all the time and so I really ought to be more forgiving, but I just read something about a 'minuet of tension' and wanted to throw things. A lot.

Anyway, I'm getting love from every bloody angle right at this moment, which I suppose is the multiverse's way of telling me to shut the fuck up with my whinging. I'm going to read some almost-definitely-guaranteed-to-be-buff fic. Stupid world showering me with nice things and making me grin. Bah.